Don't Sweat the Small Stuff... it's easier said than done, right?! I mentioned in my last post that I wasn't going to let silly little things get to me, and that I wasn't going to sweat the small stuff any more. A mess in the kitchen made by someone else, don't sweat it. Silly drivers on the road doing crazy things, don't sweat it. A number on the scale you never thought you would see again, never wanted to see again... don't sweat it. Breathe, and move on. 

It was a pound here and there over my goal weight that I finally reached at the end of 2012, beginning of 2013. However, recently it has been more than a few pounds. I told myself I would not see that number when I turned 30 or ever again (I'm now 31!), so I purchased a few Jillian Michaels DVDs that my friend recommended and got to work. I was so proud of myself for sticking to it; I changed my eating habits and worked out at least 4 times a week in 2012 to 2013. You can read about the start of this journey here and here. 

At first I didn't sweat the few pounds I had gained, why let it bother me when I could still fit into the same sized clothing? I tried to promise myself that I wouldn't see that number again, but since about the end of last year I have stayed over it. I got tired of keeping up with the food journal and only kept up with my work out routine every other week.  But now after three weeks of not keeping up with my workout routine and eating like there is no tomorrow, my clothes are starting to feel a little snug. Oh, and these love handles...what's to love about them?! 

 I know, I know, we are not a number on a scale. But, when I see the number I know that I am not being healthy and therefore I am not happy with myself. The clothes may have fit, but I knew I wasn't eating healthy and I saw that my body was changing. My thighs were getting bigger and I could see that I was just losing the curves and shape I had worked so hard for two years ago. 

So, why am I not keeping up with it? Well I am a big time stress eater, which is why I'm trying to learn how  not to sweat the small stuff!! 

Big time, life changing stressful events happen and sometimes those things get the best of us (GOD knows I had a few of those at the end of last year)...but I can't keep worrying about the little things that I can't change. 

I'm not sure if I'll start with the food journal again, but I did start my workout routine again. Yesterday was Day 1...

Getting Back to Confident

How is everyone's week going? Well, for me it's been pretty busy around here, but no more excuses as to why I'm not fit and healthy ladies! I need to do this for myself and doing it for you is the only way to really stay motivated. You can't compare yourself to someone else, you can't do it for some guy you are trying to impress, and you can't do it because you are jealous of your sister! Ladies, get fit and get healthy FOR YOURSELF! No more, "I don't have time", "I'm too busy", or "Healthy food is too expensive".....there are work out videos out there for 30 mins, 15 mins, etc. and look for coupons and stop ordering pizza to save your money for fruit! Don't push yourself too hard, start off slow and easy. There is no rush to the finish line, this is a life long goal, a way of living every day. There is no magical "diet" that will get you healthy and fit in 2 weeks, you have to stay healthy and fit every day, not just for bikini season. 

Plus, don't punish yourself if you do have a slice of pizza or a piece of chocolate. Also, don't ban yourself from eating foods you love, don't do a no carbs if you really love bread (totally me!). A diet is not a fad, your diet is what you eat, they are the foods and drinks you consume on a daily basis. Yes, you can change your diet to something that is more low in sugar, or add more fruits and veggies to your diet. But it is not something that you go on to instantly become a super model overnight. That is unrealistic. 

So, I know that it's not going to happen over night and I am not setting a goal like I did for my 30th birthday, which I was very happy to be under 200 for that! But now at age 31 (only a year later) I am over my goal weight and I am a little upset, I told myself I would never go back over 200. Like I said above, I'm not punishing myself, but more pushing myself back into it. Last year we were doing really well, eating salads, not too much junk food in the house, and working out or walking at least 3 times a week. We are still doing OK, but we need to get rid of the junk food and start moving more again.

When I look at the upper two photos from Winter 2012 and Spring 2013, I see a me who was happier because clothes were fitting better, and it was fun to go shopping. Then when I look at the photos at the bottom, esp. the one to the left (where I'm wearing the same top from Spring 2013) I see a me who is hiding behind a scarf because the top is too tight and I was uncomfortable in it. It's not really about what I look like, but more about how I feel. I know that top fit me better a year before and I know that I felt more confident in it. So my goal is to get back to confident, get back to not feeling uncomfortable in my clothes. Ladies, let's not set a goal weight, you are not the number on the scale. You are the way you feel, and I want to feel confident again. 

Thanks for stopping by, come back tomorrow for my Five Things link up with Little Miss Mama, who also inspired this post because she put herself out there on her blog today too! 

Fitness Update...

I am overwhelmed by the amount of support and beautiful comments from my wonderful blogger friends on my previous post about my journey to a healthy me. Thank you all so much, I love you gals! It's been about three weeks now that I have been using the Diet Diary app and have been keeping up with it every day. The calorie count on each food item may not be exact, but it helps me see what I'm eating as well as how much I'm exercising. I am happy to say that I have finally reached the three week mark of sticking with my workout routine! Usually I would go for two weeks, stop for a week, and so on. But with the help of my workout buddies group on facebook, my food journal, and all of the love and support from family and friends I am sticking with it.

My friends have been telling me about Jillian Michaels workout videos and I have decided to give one of them a try. At first I was a little worried that she would be a little intimidating and scary, like how she is on The Biggest Loser. But she's inspiring, motivating, and makes the workout fun...yes fun! I can't believe I tried her kickboxing video first before trying something that may have been a bit easier. I may not get all of the moves exactly right or do them as fast as she does, but that takes time. When I started out three weeks ago I was about 208-210 and now I'm 204! Besides exercising every day I have also cut out the late night snacking, which I think the food journal is a big help with. I have also started to eat more fruits and veggies and even watch what I eat when I go to parties and such.

Oh and I can't believe I fit into a pair of skinny jeans!! I can't thank you all enough for all of your love and support!!

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My Journey to a Fit and Healthy Me...

I'm starting a food and exercise journal to help me stay on track with well...food and exercise! I enjoy exercising; riding my bike, going for a walk, working out on the treadmill, but I usually get bored with it and stop for a week or so. The problem with stopping is that I usually like to snack and snack late at night...so when I stop exercising the pounds add up and I become really unhappy with myself! It's become a routine where I exercise for two weeks, stop for a week or so, gain a few pounds, and then realize I need to lose those pounds I gained, and then I get bored again. But it's not just about losing their few extra pounds that I just put on. I want to eat healthier every day and continue to eat healthy, I also want to tone my arms and legs, and be a dress/pant size that isn't considered plus in some stores.

Don't get me wrong, I love who I am and I am very proud of how far I've come with my body image and weight loss struggle. In college and a few years after I graduated I weighed almost 250 lbs...yup I said it, I put that number out there. And now I weigh 205...sometimes I look back at my photos and I can't believe how heavy I was and how fat my face looked! I believe I started struggling with my weight in middle school (6-8th grade) and continued to get heavier from there until about 10th -11th grade when I began to lose weight, but put it back on in college. The year before our wedding I was determined to not be "fat" in our wedding photos and in my wedding gown. In 2009 I was at my smallest dress size, which was still a 14, but was really happy to see that number. I would really love to get around size 12, right now I'm a size 16.

Today is Day 4 that I've been keeping track with my own food journal and with an android app on my phone called My Diet Diary. Wow, what a difference it makes when you look at the calories you have eaten and what you have left to eat for the day. It also opens your eyes to see how many calories just one cookie or even a salad has in it. Oh and that glass of wine that you used to have two of, well now that you learned that it has 256 calories for just 3.5 oz, you'll only be having one tonight!

The food journal app makes it fun to eat healthy and now that I can see what I'm doing and how I can reach my goal, it makes me feel good. You don't need to go crazy and just eat fruits and veggies every day; but eat one cookie instead of four, stop drinking soda and even diet soda, use less sugar, exercise even if it's just going for a leisurely walk, write down in a journal what you are doing, and even start a workout group with your friends. I've recently started a workout buddies group on facebook and it feels good knowing that I can share my story with other women who are struggling with weight loss and fitness just like I am. These are women who are positive, supportive, and encouraging. And even though we can't walk together in person, we are there for each other.

Photos of My Progress...

                                             

Here I am on vacation in 2006...don't you like my hair do...I mean don't!

Later that year (2006) getting ready at my best friend's wedding. (I look like I could be a linebacker for The Steelers...not a fan!)

At my smallest, which was still a dress size 14, in 2009 trying on my wedding dress.

Here I am a few months ago (2012) on vacation this summer back to a size 16...

What I've always struggled with are my arms and my thighs, but looking back at these photos I am very pleased with how much thinner my face looks. In 2006 you couldn't even see my jaw line! I am also glad I don't wear my hair and tweeze my eye brows like I used to in 2006!!!

How have you changed through out the years, have you struggled with your weight and your body image?