I miss you guys and I'm so sorry I've been lacking again. With the school year coming to an end there are a lot of things going on with my stepdaughters that keep me busy, busy, busy! My oldest was in the school play of Peter Pan and this week she was in the choir's Spring Concert. It's hard to believe she's going to be a senior next year...what happened to the little 11 year old I met who gave me dirty looks and wasn't sure if she liked me yet! LOL! I was really nervous when I first met her, my husband warned me that she might be a little difficult but that his youngest, who was 8 at the time, might be a little easier to deal with. When I first met them we were in the car and the youngest said, "Diana" and I thought, "Oh no what is she going to ask!" so I said, "Yes?" and she said the cutest thing and stole my heart when she said, "You're Pretty!"...AWWW!!! Her sister just said, "Yeah, you're pretty." Like, sure yeah, whatever! But over the years we got to know each other and our love for one another grew stronger and stronger and now when they go out and do things with their friends I miss them and can't wait for them to get home! They surprised me for Mother's Day and made cards and bought me an adorable butterfly planter without their dad even mentioning anything! Their older brother also came down from college for a visit and brought flowers for me! We have all come a long way and now I don't know what I would do without them in my life. They impress me and inspire me, and every day I'm just amazed with their kindness, talent, intelligence, and thoughtfulness. I'm very blessed to be a part of this beautiful family.

How was your Mother's Day? I hope it was just as wonderful as mine was!

Hoot Hoot...

I Love, Love, Love my new owl tattoo!!! This may be my fourth tattoo, but this one hurt the most. Even when you've had tattoos done before you are never really ready for that first touch of the needle. But it was all worth it because I just adore it so much! This is a fresh photo of it, it's still healing and still a little swollen! I was a little nervous about getting it on my forearm, but I'm really glad that I went through with getting it.

How adorable are they!!

They were inpsired by my stepdaughter's drawing she did for me....

Turning 29....

I thought I would love this age and be excited that 30 is almost here and when I turned 28 last year, I thought wow in two years I'll finally be 30 and get out of that 20 something stage. But now that I'm 29, I feel like I'm panicking about 30. When you're a teen getting ready for college you have these thoughts and dreams about what you want to do by age 30. You make a list in your mind or even on paper about all the things you want to do, see, and accomplish by 30. So when 30 is just around the corner and you haven't done some of those things you hit the panic button. You hit the panic button or you just lose motivation. I had a wonderful time celebrating my birthday with my family and friends, who showered me with love, but I had this empty feeling like I wanted something more. But I know that I am the only one who can give myself that or fill that void.

I love my family and would never change a thing about that part of my life. Never would I have imagined marrying such a wonderful, smart, sweet man and being blessed with three great step-children as well. While I was making dinner tonight I thought, "Wow, I'm making dinner for my family." Never would I have thought that one day I would be making dinner, let alone making dinner for a family that I called my own. I'm grateful and truly blessed and surrounded by people who love me for me.

Blogging has really opened a wonderful door for me and editing for All Women Stalk has given me the opportunity to chat with people from all around the world and put my work, writing, and voice out there. I really enjoy editing, interacting with guest bloggers, interviewing people, and giving others a voice. But some where along the lines of doing more editing than writing I feel like I lost my voice and now that I am back to doing more writing and only editing my own work, I need to find my drive again. I need to find who I am, who I want to be, and where I fit in.

It's not that I'm scared of taking risks because I've pushed myself to be the first one in my family to go to college and I've pushed myself to say hello to the man I married, and I pushed myself to become a writer and an editor. I'm proud of myself and grateful for my life, my family, and my job. I know there are many people today who are struggling to keep their jobs, to get a new one, and to keep their homes.

The difficult thing is that I'm not sure what I want. I would like to take some classes and go back to school, but I need to explore and do some research to see where I would like to take my career before I take that next step.

Have you ever had this feeling of wanting to find yourself or wanting more? How did you take turning 30, 40, 50, and so on?